Cover Story: Tea dancers cut a rug

An elderly man and woman dance together

By Gerald Hay

Nat and June Cassingham enjoy a fun, memory-laden activity as a step, in their case many steps, at keeping active in life’s later years.

They go ballroom dancing.

The Cassinghams are among two dozen or so of aging adults cutting a rug at tea dances from 1 to 3 p.m. on Fridays at the Meadowbrook Park Clubhouse, 9101 Nall Ave., Prairie Village. Note, the dance floor isn’t carpeted.

“We like dancing to the songs we did 50 or 60 years ago when we were young,” said 94-year-old Nat.

June, 90, agreed.

“It was fun then. It’s still fun now,” she added.

Sponsored by the 50 Plus Department of the Johnson County Park and Recreation District, the weekly tea dances attract couples and singles to dance, listen to live music and spend time with others.

Costing $5 per person and open to anyone, the tea dances are casual. Most, if not all, participants in the weekly events are in their 60s or older.

Performed by the five-piece band, the Kansas City Swing, the tunes are a mixed bag of musical nostalgia for participants to be swept off their feet as couples dance – hand-in-hand, face-to-face, step-by-step – together.

Elderly couples dance together in a large room

When not on the dance floor, the participants sit, eat light refreshments, chat in camaraderie or just listen to the band.

Dancing is an important activity for Nat and June. They met and wed 15 years ago.

“We had to do something together, so why not go dancing,” Nat said.

With a book of sheet music containing a few hundred songs, the band plays about 20 songs, with occasional musical requests, at each two-hour dance. Rock ‘n’ roll, swing, waltz, foxtrot, beguine and rhumba are the most popular choices, but tunes for country, mambo, salsa and bossa nova dancing also are played.

For Ellen Ross, 65, Overland Park, it’s never too late to learn to dance. She had long been keen to try her hand and feet at dancing for years, but her husband didn’t like to dance. The opportunity finally arrived when she became single and began taking lessons about a year ago.

“I didn’t want to be the person sitting at the table while others danced,” Ross said with a smile.

Alan and Sharon Christiansen travel from Blue Springs, Missouri, to participate in the weekly tea dances. When asked if there are places to dance in their community, Sharon laughed, answering: “There is music but then there is ballroom dance music!”

Her husband of 54 years echoed the sentiment.

“They don’t have that kind of music. We love that music,” he added.

Alan Christiansen also likes the fact the tea dances are for anyone, whether he or she has a partner or not. Most participants are couples, but dancers often change.

“We can trade partners without anyone getting upset,” he said. 

An elderly man and woman dance together

Various studies show ballroom dancing is a positive way for aging adults to improve their physical and mental well-being and enjoy some ageless fun.

According to Ashley Follett, community information coordinator at the Johnson County Department of Health and Environment, dancing offers a unique blend of health benefits, including:

  • Improved cardiovascular fitness
  • Enhanced flexibility
  • Better balance for maintaining mobility and preventing falls.

“It’s great exercise, that’s for sure. We are a generation of people who just love dancing, and it shows,” said Claude Cowart, 90, Overland Park. “It keeps us moving, and mentally remembering the steps keeps us thinking.”

Ross agreed, saying, “It’s really good for your mind.”

Cowart and Mary Ellen White, 91, who goes by “Mell,” have been best friends for about two years and regularly attend the weekly tea dance.

“It’s just fun to be with each other and do something together,” Mell said. (Her nickname comes from combined the four letters in her first and middle names.) “It’s just a great, great time.”

Follett points out social interactions at the tea dances are also important in reducing isolation and anxiety.

“It also provides a fun way to boost mood and mental well-being, reducing the risk of depression and isolation,” she said. “Additionally, dancing fosters valuable social connections, creating a supportive community that enhances overall health and happiness.”

A swing band plays together in a large room

June Cassingham enjoys the “wonderful social atmosphere” in the weekly tea dances.

“It’s just great fun and a great social time,” she said.

For the most part, tea dance participants just seem to have the best time reviving pleasantries from their younger days when learning to dance was part of their lives with dancing at teenaged sock hops, high school proms, and community and barn dances.

Songs range from bygone hits like “Bandstand Boogie” and “Tutti Frutti” for rock ‘n’ rollers, “Could I Have This Dance” and “Falling in Love Again” for waltzers to “Your Cheatin’ Heart” and “Crazy” for country dancers.

Mell likes West Coast swing, adding she was once known for her “happy feet,” and doing the jitterbug.

The Christiansens have different favorite dances. Alan likes to chacha; Sharon prefers waltzing.

“He knows better than expect me to cha-cha,” she said with a laugh. “His lucky streak and 54 years of marriage would change and come to an end if that ever happens.”

As the Kansas City Swing played the next song, they returned to the dance floor once again.

It was a waltz, of course.